Feedback with Heated Emotions (Nursing)

by Amber Vanderburg

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    00:00 Sometimes, feedback gets heated. Sometimes, feedback gets emotional.

    00:09 And while we encourage feedback to be given in a timely manner, sometimes feedback is delayed and emotions build up to an explosion of frustration and anger and sometimes feedback begins as a calm conversation and then quickly builds into a heated emotional intense conversation.

    00:32 And this brings me to another important element of performance feedback.

    00:38 We must consider the emotions when giving performance feedback and we must be prepared to have conversations with heated tensions.

    00:50 There are entire courses on de-escalation tactics available for an in-depth look at this topic and this certainly is not an all inclusive set of tools.

    01:03 But I want to provide a few practical steps that you can use to de-escalate heated conversations.

    01:13 First, de-escalate yourself.

    01:17 Whether you are giving or receiving feedback, if a situation escalates, it is natural for you to mirror the emotions of the others in the room.

    01:30 Take a moment. Take a breath.

    01:35 Control your emotions and de-escalate yourself before you try to de-escalate anyone else.

    01:44 Relax your body. Unlock your jaw. Unclench your fist.

    01:50 Adjust your physical position to appear non-threatening.

    01:56 De-escalate yourself first. Then listen, genuinely and sincerely listen.

    02:06 Don't listen for a response, listen for understanding.

    02:11 Oftentimes people become heated simply because they want to be heard.

    02:17 Allow their voices to be heard. Listen.

    02:21 Use empathy statements in these situations to clarify your understanding of the emotion.

    02:28 Are they angry, scared, tired, overwhelmed, hungry? Perhaps it's a combination of things.

    02:36 Check your understanding so you can better empathize and understand the situation.

    02:45 Another tool for de-escalation is to apologize.

    02:50 There is nothing more disarming than a sincere apology. Let's be honest.

    02:56 or the fact that they weren't bothered that they mess up your order? or the fact that they weren't bothered that they mess up your order? Imagine how far a sincere apology can go.

    03:12 Another tool is to create an action plan for improvement.

    03:17 Sometimes this can be as simple as a response stating "Wow, I had no idea that you felt that way. I will keep that into consideration next time and do this and that instead." This reiterates that their frustration has been heard and that you have taken their feedback seriously.

    03:41 Sometimes, we can predict when a conversation will become heated.

    03:47 Other times, a conversation will become heated without notice.

    03:52 In either case, here's what I want you to do. I want you to first take a breath to calm yourself.

    04:02 Listen with empathy and then come up with a plan of action for the future.

    About the Lecture

    The lecture Feedback with Heated Emotions (Nursing) by Amber Vanderburg is from the course Communication in Healthcare (Nursing).

    Included Quiz Questions

    1. Take a deep breath to de-escalate themselves.
    2. Start talking in a low, slow voice.
    3. Tell the nurse to take a deep breath.
    4. Encourage the nurse to move to a more private area.
    1. Self-de-escalation, empathic listening, action planning
    2. De-escalation, self-de-escalation, debriefing
    3. Empathic listening, de-escalation, debriefing
    4. Empathic listening, action planning, de-escalation

    Author of lecture Feedback with Heated Emotions (Nursing)

     Amber Vanderburg

    Amber Vanderburg

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